Setup of a WIFI home network so that sites and access can be monitered

here are some possible solutions for you:
1. adding a proxy server to your router:
if your router supports a proxy service, you can route every client to the following proxy
67.52.216.216 Port 80
this address is a public library's proxy and will probably meet your needs just fine,
Pro's: you don't have to maintain a list of where people can and can't go.
Con's: VERY SLOW, this slows down your connection greatly. Few routers have this capability.
2. setting up parental controls on your router.
you can restrict access to certain types of websites or addresses themselves by parental controls based on your router. In your router's config page there should be a parental control page where you can block out by keyword, website address etc.. This might be the solution you want to take.
Pro's: most routers have this feature, it's usually free, it doesn't slow down your internet access.
Con's: you have to maintain the list of blacklisted keywords/websites.
3. set up your own ISA server.
This is a corporate level solution and probably isn't economically feasible. But to any others who might be reading this thread read on:
Pro's: combination managed/automated blacklists. speed not affected too greatly.
Con's: Expensive.

whatever route you take, I strongly suggest you invest in a firewall since your neighbors will be on the same subnet as yourself. your computer may treat them as part of a local network and let them bypass any firewall rules you have.

to monitor traffic you don't need to buy any extra hardware, just simply need network traffic monitor software or packet sniffers. Most of these tools are free.
here's one if you're not too interested in looking for them.
http://sourceforge.net/projects/ntm/

how do i get to see wat site ppl have been on???

that's where the monitoring software comes in. maybe the one I posted isn't the easiest to read for that, but you can search for a free one. most of the reports will come in the form of
192.168.0.xx -> XX.XX.XX.XX
where the second address is their destination. (you might be able to find a program that will show a website name instead of an ip address).
I should warn you that there is still a possiblility that one of your users may still use a P2P client and in that case, will seriously impact your internet connection and probably not even show 1 single ip address but rather hundreds.

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